Day 60: OK OK I KNOW, this took forever to write

So day 60 has come and gone, but I never wrote about it! Shame on me. I didn't skip the 60th day, in case you were wondering. Here is photo proof:



Day 60 was a tough one. I again took class with Joseph Encinia, and it was pretty much as hard as the one before. I recall feeling pretty out of sorts and maybe a little burned out. It was a pretty crazy mix of emotions when I finished. I may or may not have cried a little bit during final savasana. I got a t-shirt from the studio as a reward for finishing the challenge. It says: "I survived the Bikram Yoga challenge... and I got a new body, new mind, and new life." Best thing about said shirt? It's a size medium. I have never worn a size medium in my recollection. It's pretty close to my body, but it's definitely wearable. Success!

In other size-related news, I checked my scale and I lost around 12 pounds during the challenge. I didn't count calories at all. I found myself wanting to cook good food and eat small portions. It was as if suddenly, my food issues were gone. Gross foods I used to love suddenly were revolting to me.

In still more size-related news, I went clothes shopping (this one's for you, Jen) and was completely unsure of what size I wore so I had to try on a range of sizes to see where I was. It was actually kind of fun and I was astonished to find myself in the lowest size I've worn in my adult life. I dropped 2 sizes over the course of the 2-month challenge, and am now down a whopping 8 sizes since last Christmas. Additionally, I'm 3 band sizes smaller in my bra. Not much change in the cup yet. Sigh.

Since I was on a budget, I had to shop sensibly, but I got a faux leather jacket in hunter green, an awesome grey knit wrap that Jason says makes me look like a theater professor, a couple striped shirts (a go-to in my closet), a pair of fern green cargo pants, a pair of dark wash jeans, a sensible pair of black slacks (which I wore to my homeowner's association meeting last week), and a couple other smaller things. This was my reward to myself for completing the challenge! Jason took me to Spiral Diner as his reward, which was equally as awesome.

So what have I been up to since completing my challenge? A lot, but not a lot of yoga, unfortunately. I was on a big high during the last 15 days of the challenge and after it was over, I had an equally large crash. I felt like I didn't have a solid goal anymore and my attitude started nose-diving. I allowed myself to fall victim to excuses: "I have too much to do today to go to yoga," "it would be easier if I didn't have to drive out to Mockingbird," "I've got to get ready for my upcoming trip, it's okay to let yoga go on the back burner til I'm back." I took a day off, which melted into two. I took a weekend off, which melted into four days off. My food issues started creeping back and I started getting anxiety again. Last night hit and I decided it was time to cut the crap and be real with myself.

I think as we strive to achieve goals, there will always be plateaus. There will come a week where you just say yes to the short-term pleasures (i.e., being lazy on the couch) and say no to hard work. You'll eat more than you should at a meal, or get to class but don't push yourself as hard as you should. These things are almost certain to happen at some point and it's not inherently bad. It's how you push through these things and allow them to be the exception, not the habit, that determines your success. I'm human. I have bad weeks. But something Kasper said in the discussion a couple months ago (paraphrasing, yo) has come to me very recently that has made me re-commit to my practice: "When I do yoga, life is good. When I don't, it isn't. So I do yoga."

I'm going back tomorrow and I'm going every day until we leave for vacation on Saturday (2 weeks in Boston with my family AND I'm becoming an aunt - YAY!!!). On vacation, I am firmly holding myself to my original plan of practicing 3-4 times a week. If I need to get up early to fit it all in, I will do that. One of the things I like best about this practice is being a good role model, so to speak, for my parents. My mom was inspired by my hard work and has gone on her own weight loss journey, which I'm so incredibly proud of her for! I can't go home and allow a bad attitude to thwart their goals. I need to show them that we can all do it - get healthy, stay healthy, and be happy. I'm even going to work on my folks to come to yoga with me, which is going to be a huge struggle I'm not sure will end up bearing any fruit, but that I feel I should definitely try anyway.

I have felt such a negative change in my mood and body since taking a little breather on yoga, and it's been the kick I've needed to go back and recapture the goodness. Thankfully, it didn't take me all that long to figure this out, so I don't anticipate having that hard of a time falling back into it, though I do think tomorrow's class is going to be a doozy. I'll let you know how it goes!